The Married Life
by Ruby-Guardian
Summary: You'd think once they settled down all would be calm and peacefull. Well you were wrong, there relationship is as hectic as ever. From an outsiders point of view they can seem quite disfunctional, but c'mon! This is Ash and Misty everybody! :D
1. Drunk

"Ash are you drunk?" His red-headed fiancee stated. "Brock is going to be coughing up blood after the wedding." Even though he was drunk beyond belief, Ash still felt the dangerous vibe eminating from her. He walked up to her and placed a shakey hand on her shoulder. With a knocked out look on his face Ash pointed a finger at her.

"You know _yur_, very pretty when you're angry miss." "If I weren't engaged to my f-fox of a wife you'd be my next choice." This peeked her intrest and she couldn't help the ashamed blush she got off a comment from a drunk, soon to be wed, 21 year old man.

"Ohh really?" He nodded and smiled like he were half awake.

"Of course Misty," she was suprised he still remembered her name, due to his current state, but shook it off. She sighed and helped him sit on the couch of their current home in Cerulean, they were planning to move to Pallet town after a year of training Daisy to become a professional gym leader.

"Stay here, I'll get you some water to clear you're system from all the booze Brock gave you." She walked away when she saw him nod and thanked Arceus he was a light weight, now if she was the one getting drunk it would take a whole lot more beer to get her even the lightest bit tipsy. She walked toward the sink with the filter for clean water, and poured some in a cup. Upon return to her fiancee, she nearly dropped the glass when she saw him in a feedle position in the corner of their living room crying.

"What are you doing?" He looked up and she nearly toppled over as he sprang up and engulfed her in an Ursaring hung. "If you throw up on me I'll make you see Jirachi's, Ketchum."

"I thought you left me for evers, Mist!"

"I was in the kitchen, you could see me from here."

"I thought you were packing my bags and kicking me out for feeding our rent to our Lillipup!"

"We don't even have a Lillipup, Ash, and I'm not kicking you out."

"Then I'd be forced into homelessness and never get a job."

"Now that's dumb, you're the freakin pokemon master for crying out-!"

"I'd be forced into male prostitution, and have to sell my body to make a living."

"What are you talking abou-?"

"ADMIT IT, YOU ARE KICKING ME OUT!"

"WHAT?"

"LIES!"

"Calm down Ash, the weddings next week and I have no plans on kicking you out."

"WHAT ABOUT THE BABY HUH!"

"What baby, we don't have a baby!"

"YET! It's all a matter of time before they start to plot against me." He faced Misty's flat, without a bump, stomache and screamed. "YOU WILL NOT WIN, YOU HEAR!" Misty was getting rather tired and pinched his neck before he could do anything else stupid. He calmed down for a second before he fell on the ground unconscious.

"Thank you self defense classes," she threw one of his arms over her shoulder and lifted him up, to only be set down again on the couch.

"So I'm a lovey drunk and you're a clingey drunk,"

_Our kids are going to be _soo_ disfunctional._

* * *

**Hehe, not supposed to be taken seriously this story, I just thought it'd be fun to adventure threw the marriage of Ash and Misty**

_**~Eevee-Mistress**_


	2. Crying at a Wedding

The tears streamed down his face and she placed a hand on his shoulder, his breathe got caught in his throat and he sounded pained.

"Ash, are you ok?" He nodded and Misty stood across from him in confusion, "a-are you crying?"

"O-of course no-ot." He wiped his _manly_ tears on his sleeve and tried to calm down. "Pokemon Masters don't cry." She laughed and cupped his face gently, Misty was holding herself back from breaking out in laughing. "I just can't believe, after eleven years," she pulled him into a hug and he loudly cried on her shoulder.

"It's ok, I understand." She whispered soothing words into his ear and he soon straightened himself out enough respond.

"What if I can't make you happy, and you leave me for some perfect guy, like Rudy, who you only see in spanish soap operas!" He turned to said guy, "no offense." There were some laughs here and there, but he brought his attention back to his girlfriend.

"I'd never leave you for another man if he were blessed by Jirachi, or Lugia, or any rare pokemon!" She screamed in his face, her expression soon calmed and she gave him a quick peck on the cheek. "I love you, Ash, and don't ever deny it!" He nodded and straightened himself out.

"Sorry everyone, I guess I just had some insecurities." The audience laughed in awkwardness and ushered for them to continue. Ash and Misty nodded, and he turned to Father Whithner. "Sorry for the interuption, continue." He nodded and gave Misty a sympathetic look.

"If anyone objects as to why these two sha'll not be wed, speak now or forever hold your truth!" When noone bothered to say anything he continued, "Well, I now pronounce you man and wife, you may kiss the bride." During the kiss and applause Misty could only think,

_What have I gotten myself into?_

**Sigh, only Ash would cry in the middle of his own wedding ^ ^". Hope you enjoy this crack**

_**~Eevee-Mistress**_


	3. Jealous Gambling

A month after there wedding, they were invited to spend a day at the beach near Cerulean by May, Max, and Brock. Gary just so happened to be there to do research on a water type pokemon rarely seen in Kanto. They found a spot near the soft ocean and thanked they decided to come early on account of all the poor people looking for a spot in the sandy terrain. Misty was happily playing with her new Vaporeon Gary had gotten her for a wedding present. Ash left a while ago to get some things from there car and was currently no where to be found.

"May, Brock, he's back again." Max, now 14, pointed to a man about Ash's age with brown hair and tan skin like his. The man had been trying to catch her attention by throwing a frisbee in her way, this had been his third try since he kept miss aiming, but this time suceeded.

Gary walked by them and scoffed at what the teen pointed to. "It's Ash's fault for picking a hot wife," Misty in a blue bikini top and matching surfer shorts, picked up the frisbee and handed it sweetly back to it's owner. Once she returned the thing, she brought her attention back to her Vaporeon, glad to have her trainers attention back. The man though, didn't give up so quickly. He continued the small talk and such. Misty started to get rather annoyed and tried desperatly to keep her anger at bay.

"He's going to die if he keeps trying to talk to her." Commented Gary, "her anger management classes can only do so much." Max snorted.

"No way, look at Vaporeon, she's just about had with that guy." He had a smug expression on his face now. "I bet five that Vaporeon will save the day!"

"Are you crazy?" Stated his sister. "Ash is going to come swooping in any second now and save her, like in those soap operas." Brock pet Ash's PIkachu as it stirred in it's sleep.

"I have to agree with May on this one," She smiled triumphantly only to be put down again. "But Ash is a pacifist so he'll use a pokemon."

They all turned there attention back towards the peir where a fuming pokemon master stomped his way to the man hitting on his wife. He started glaring at the guy for who sheepishly smiled and raised his hand in defense. Just when the guy started to step back, away from the angry man, Ash called out Charizard who spewed out a flame thrower in the mans face. Misty smiled gratefully an he joined her in merriments with her Eevee-lution.

All, but Brock, groaned and handed him the five dollars he so deserved. Even though it was the fifth time he'd seen some thing like that happen this month.

_Cheater._

**I love a jealous Ash, and I'm guessing Misty does to, what with her anger management classes TTuTT. Anyways, I added a Vaporeon cause, well, hello? Pen name anyone?**

**EEVEE Mistress ring a bell? Just like putting 2 and 2 together which we all know equals fish.**

**Just like 1+1= Window.**

**What was I talking about, _Magicarp_, anyways bye! And please review!**

_**~Eevee-Mistress**_


	4. Brocks Car, Ash's Ignorance

"ASH," screamed his wife. "GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW!"

As soon as Ash heard her voice, he winced and sluggishly walked down stairs as she waited in the kitchen, impatiently tapping her foot on the wooden floor of there home in Palet Town. "Yes dear?"

Misty gripped the phone attatched to the video phone placed near the wall. "Care to explain why Brock just happened to call me and say we owe him a new car?" He shrunk a little at her tone and played with his fingers to keep from looking at her.

"...No."

"ASHTON KETCHUM!"

"Fine!" He waved up his hands all defensive like and composed himself. "Ok, when me and Brock went to Viridian City, he told me to park the car, and I did." " But when we came back, the car was stolen and there was no trace of it what-so-over."

Misty raised a brow and shifted her weight towards her left foot, "but that doesn't make sense as to why we owe him a car if it was stolen."

"I'm getting to that," he stared up at the ceiling while he continued. "We called Officer Jenny and she found the driver, the driver said the doors were unlocked when he found it so Brock blames me for it."

"I don't understand what any of that has to do with Brock saying we owe him a car!" He shrugged his shoulders and Misty sighed in exasperation. "Ok, I believe you and I'm sorry." Ash smiled a bit and she gave him a sweet hug, which he quickly returned.

"Plus I might of crashed into other cars while I parking."

And to this day, Ash had never gotten a bigger bruise on his head.

**Sigh, this one sucks. I know, I had no inspiration, I just felt like I needed to upload already I promise, the next one will be better, stronger, AND TWENTY TIMES AS FUNNY ! Ok that might be too much.**

**anyways this is really short and i wanna apoligize for this lame excuse of an update again**

_**~Eevee-Mistress**_


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